Him vs Her – Morning Routine –
Today we want to introduce you to a revolutionary toothbrush, the FOREO ISSA and ISSA Hybrid! In addition, I’m going to try to explain my total aggravation stemming from the effortless ease of Chandler’s morning routine vs. my own morning routine. Men have it so easy. Chandler does for sure. While women, most of us anyway, have so many steps we go through just to get out the front door. I’m not even getting into makeup, just the absolute basics of our morning routines. Keep reading to see!
But before we even get into this little pissing match, I’ve got to tell you all about this amazing toothbrush. Then we’ll get into my morning routine, and Chandler will finish off explaining his ridiculous, Usain Bolt style, regimen. So, we got two FOREO ISSA toothbrushes, cool black and mint as well as matching ISSA Hybrid brush heads. These toothbrushes are not cheap, but when you care for your teeth properly they are really worth the investment. Your teeth are forever, so no excuses when your smile takes a Steve Buscemi turn for the worse if you insist on using a 99 cent toothbrush from the dollar store. Firstly, the brush heads are replaceable and those are very inexpensive ($19.95) and they last a whole year. Another thing we love about this product is how gentle they are on your teeth and gums. I know for a fact that I used to brush too hard so this was perfect for me. Just use regular toothpaste, we always use the whitening kind, then you press the center button to turn on and you can adjust the intensity by pressing the + or – buttons. You start in one quadrant of the mouth and after 30 seconds the pulsing will pause indicating it’s time to move to the next section. 2 minutes and you’re done! Now if you think the regular ISSA is too gentle then the Hybrid is just what you need. It’s has the soft silicone brushes for the gums but the center has PBT polymer bristles that covers the surface area of your teeth, it’s a win-win! Seriously, try it out for yourself and thank us later. Now onto our morning routine.
Rachel: Here are my morning routine basics. First things first, brushing my teeth. Morning breath is not my happy place. I am so glad I found this toothbrush! Mine is the Mint colored one, obvi. After a thorough and gentle brushing it’s time to floss. As far as floss brands go, I don’t discriminate, CVS brand works for me. Right now I am testing out a bunch of amazing skin care products and brands, more to come on that soon, but for the sake of this post I will let you know I am always using or looking for a brightening face wash because I have a dose of melasma which I am blaming on my current birth control. So when these photos were taken I was using an old favorite, Aveeno Positively Radiant. And while I may be trying different skin care products one thing I always use is my Clarisonic Mia like I introduced in this post. So far I have brushed my teeth, flossed, and washed my face with my helpful tool. Now it’s time to add some preventative face products including a Vitamin C serum, eye cream and a moisturizer with SPF 15 at the very least. I have actually started using SPF 30 because of that “freakishly hideous” melasma I mentioned.
Now remember, my morning routine does not include hair or makeup because I am taking the kids to school and then I head home. So next up deodorant. I absolutely cannot leave the house without adding an air-freshener to my armpits. New car smell? Nah, though again, I am not very picky about this product though I usually use men’s because I think it works better, but again, as I mentioned in this post the Dove Dry Spray is awesome.
Now it’s time to drink my coffee or tea and take my meds. We are all a little crazy right? Even though I should probably be on something, I’m joking. These days the only pills I swallow are the crazy birth control you see above. I am just thankful this is my last pack. I swear, the only time I had melasma before was when I was pregnant and it appeared in the form of a very “distinguished looking” mustache. Ladies and gents. I am 100% not pregnant but I swear, a week after I started this pill the stache reappeared with a vengeance. And this time it wasn’t alone. It brought a friend, this crazy looking patch on my forehead. So yes, I am praying that as soon as these little blue pills that keep me from reproducing run out, these patches will not be far behind. Bye-bye, take a hike, get lost. If that doesn’t work, off to the dermatologist I go. BTW, if you or someone you know has any questions about melasma feel free to leave a comment or email me. Sorry, I seem to have gotten off track. Besides the little blue monsters I also take a daily probiotic, fish-oil capsule and multi-vitamin. If I washed and did my hair the night before then I am good to go, otherwise I throw my greasy hair into a ponytail which I then cover with a baseball cap. That my friends is what it takes to get me up and out the door. Now I am going to pass it along to Chandler. Take it away hot stuff.
Chandler: I want to begin by apologizing to women worldwide for all the things you have to do to make it out the door. Life was never supposed to be that hard, was it? Further, I would like to take this seldom given opportunity to express my respect, love, and gratitude to all the of Women in my life that make it fun. Some of the most influential people in my life have been Women. Starting, of course, with my mother. She is my rock and to this day always makes me feel like a rock-star. If I have a number one fan, it’s definitely her. (Rachel: um, hello?!)
Rachel is my soul mate. I was meant to be with her and she with me. We truly share one heartbeat. She is the craziest, most beautiful, driven, and inspiring person I will ever know. Beyond my mother and wife are my Grandmothers, Mother-In-Law, Aunts, and my bevy of beautiful, successful, and ultra intelligent cousins on my Mothers side of the family. I cherish all of you! (Rachel again: oh. Now I feel like a jackass.)
Now onto the meat of the article…had to start this thing like a compliment sandwich so I don’t come off sounding misogynistic or just mean. My morning routine is so simple it’s sad. I feel like I may have it a little easier than most men out there which makes the disconnect between our routines ever more severe. Brutal honesty. I take showers at night. I loath mornings. I wash and condition my hair once a week or my mop goes from tame to certifiable. I was born with wavy hair that does what it wants, no matter what I do. Eventually, it gets its way and I end up looking like Alfalfa from the little rascals or something to that degree of absurdity. I very rarely wash my face, as I have never had problems with zits in my life. The few times I have tried to do so has been the result of Rachel telling me how gross it is that I don’t. That being said, the times I wash my face, are the only times I ever get a zit.
Before anyone get’s too grossed out, I do use body wash. I usually just use whatever she has in the shower, no particular brand that I swear by. They all seem to work. Other than that, I’m in and out. I do shower at least 5 times a week, depending on how lazy my weekends are, maybe more.
Once I am physically and mentally able to separate myself from my bed every morning I start by cursing the universe for making mornings super early. It doesn’t feel natural to get out of bed before 8 o’clock. I do it anyway. I don’t own my own business like someone I’m married to so, I have to abide by a schedule that comes from above. Every morning, first thing, I brush my teeth, I am particular about them and I want to keep them. I usually do the flossing and the gargling of peroxide the night of, so mornings it’s a straight brush and go. The FOREO ISSA Hybrid is a game-changer. Plus in the cool black it looks like a toothbrush from outer-space. I wet my hair down a little if it’s been recently washed and I brush it like a nerd, parted neatly to the side. Then it’s onto deodorant for the man pits and cotton swabs for ears. I’m a 30-something man who cannot grow facial hair so shaving, as I do about 5 times a weeks takes all of 30 seconds. I use a wet multi-blade razor on the 6 or 7 hairs that grown on either side of my face and usually leave what I can grow, which is a spotty mustache, tiny soul patch and Shaggy-esque beard at the edge of my chinny-chin-chin.
After that, I grab a coffee and inhale a bowl of cereal and I’m out the door. Total prep time on a work day from bed to front door is probably 30 mins, but I’ve been known to do it in 15. Sorry ladies, or guys. It’s the truth.
In collaboration with Shopping Links and b-glowing we received the toothbrushes in exchange for this post. As always all opinions are our own.